7 Simple Tips for Building Unstoppable Confidence in Yourself

 

How to become more confident

Confidence is a crucial element in many aspects of life, including professional and personal interactions. It can be the difference between success and failure, and it is something that many people struggle with.

What is confidence

Confidence is the belief in oneself and one's abilities. It's the feeling of assurance that comes from knowing that you can handle whatever situation you may encounter. Confidence is not arrogance or overconfidence, but rather a healthy belief in oneself that helps to overcome fears and doubts.

Confidence is essential in both personal and professional life. It allows individuals to take risks, pursue goals, and assert themselves in challenging situations. When we have confidence, we are more likely to be successful in our endeavors.

 

"With confidence, you have won before you have started." - Marcus Garvey

1. Traits of confidence people

People who are supremely confident when they enter a room have certain characteristics that set them apart from others. Here are some most common traits of confident people:

- maintain good eye contact when speaking with others.

- stand up straight and have good posture.

- use smooth gestures to emphasize their points.

- have a relaxed and open facial expression.

- move purposefully and with ease.

 

Great actress Helen Mirren says that “one of the most difficult things to learn as an actress is how to walk onto a scene. How do you walk into the public and demonstrate that you are confident? We can all work a little bit on our non-verbal communication so we come across as more confident.

 

When we talk about confidence, it's so many things. It has to do with our posture, the way we present ourselves, how we look, where our chin is, where our eyes are looking and gazing, and our gestures. Our gestures are loose but smoother as we walk about. We walk as though we are on a mission - whether we're walking out to shake someone's hand, walking out to a podium, or walking to where we're going to sit. The less confident we are, the less eye contact we make, and the more reluctant we are to look about.

Confidence is not about being loud and dramatic. Confidence can be quiet. When you are confident, you don’t need to prove yourself. You know that you are something. Truly confident people don’t show off. They know who they are. They don’t think about what others think of them.

The other thing that confident people realize is the temporal aspect of leadership. If you're in charge, you're in charge of time. "I'm going to take my time to walk out. I'm going to take my time to answer your question. I will answer it in the pace, manner, and tone that I choose," and in doing that, we are demonstrating that we are confident and in control.

 

2. Modelling Confidence

 So, where do we get that confident voice? Where do we get those confident gestures? This is what's called socialization. We notice the principal who acts this way, we like this leader because of this or that trait, so I try to model their behaviors and say, "This is a shortcut." And if I have to work on my vocabulary, that's what high-status people do. If I have to change my gestures to fit in in this society, then that's what I'm going to have to do. That doesn't mean it changes me completely. It just means that this is what is required of me, and this is what I want to achieve at this moment in time.

 Have you ever wondered how to become a confident communicator? It can be daunting to speak in public or have a conversation with someone and come across as self-assured and assertive. However, this is not a natural trait but rather a learned one, and it all comes down to socialization.

 When we observe individuals in positions of power, we often admire their confident gestures and voice. For instance, a principal who exhibits such behavior might be appreciated and respected by students and staff alike. Modeling such behavior is a way to develop the same level of confidence. It might require us to work on our vocabulary, change our gestures, or alter the way we speak to fit in with our society. Nevertheless, it does not mean we are changing who we are fundamentally. We do it to achieve a particular goal and be perceived in a certain way.

 For instance, Cary Grant, the famous actor, was born in the UK and grew up in poverty. He claimed in his biography that he became Cary Grant by adopting the behaviors he saw in high-status individuals. This is a clear example of modeling behavior to acquire a particular trait.

If you're struggling with being confident in public speaking, observing people who are excellent communicators can help you improve. For example, if you're a woman, you might choose to model yourself on an actress like Emma Watson, paying attention to her confident gestures and commanding presence during interviews.

Also Read: 10 Life-Changing tips for teenagers 

3. Confident Behaviors

Small gestures can make a big difference in how you are perceived. For instance, instead of pointing your finger when someone asks where something is, use your whole hand to gesture in the direction, which is less threatening and more approachable. 

Additionally, having a commanding presence requires a deep, confident voice that conveys authority. It might feel unnatural at first, but with practice, you can develop a voice that demands attention and respect.

 

4. Intonation

Intonation is a crucial aspect of effective communication, and it can significantly impact how confident and authoritative one sounds while speaking. Using the right intonation can help convey a sense of certainty and conviction in what one is saying, which in turn can boost their credibility and confidence. 

To sound more confident when speaking, it is essential to maintain a steady, assertive tone and avoid ending statements with a rising inflection, which can make one's statements sound like questions or indicate uncertainty. 

Additionally, varying the pitch and speed of one's speech can add emphasis to important points and keep listeners engaged. By paying attention to their intonation and practicing to find the right tone, individuals can improve their communication skills and sound more confident when speaking.

 

5. Cadence (The rise and fall of your voice)

Cadence is also essential in commanding attention during speeches. When you talk too quickly, people are less likely to listen. Instead, using a cadence in your speech will hold their attention, and they will be curious about what you will say next. 

Martin Luther King's famous "I have a dream" speech is a perfect example of how cadence can be used to inspire and motivate people. Churchill was also known for his use of pauses and the amount of time he took to speak, which emphasized his authority and control.

"The most beautiful thing you can wear is confidence." - Blake Lively

 

6. Non-verbal communication

Non-verbal communication can often speak louder than words, and confident non-verbal communication can convey a strong sense of confidence and self-assurance. There are many different aspects of non-verbal communication that can contribute to projecting confidence, such as maintaining eye contact, standing or sitting up straight, using open gestures, and speaking clearly and concisely.

 It is important to show a calm and mature behavior, even in high-pressure situations, to show that one is in control and confident in their abilities. Confident body language can also help establish trust and build good relationship with others, making it an essential skill in both personal and professional relationships.

 By practicing good posture, maintaining eye contact, and using open and engaging body language, individuals can project a strong sense of confidence that will help them succeed in any situation.

 

7. Public Speaking

Public speaking is a common fear that many people face, but there are several strategies that can help individuals overcome this fear and become more confident speakers.

"One important key to success is self-confidence. An important key to self-confidence is preparation." - Arthur Ashe

First, it is important to practice and prepare thoroughly before any speaking engagement, whether it be a speech, presentation, or meeting. This can include practicing in front of friends or family members, recording oneself and analyzing performance, or seeking professional help such as a public speaking coach.

 Second, it can be helpful to reframe the fear of public speaking as excitement or anticipation, rather than anxiety or dread.

Third, deep breathing exercises and visualization techniques can help calm nerves and reduce anxiety before speaking.

 Fourth, engaging with the audience and focusing on the message can shift the focus away from oneself and onto the content being presented.

 Finally, it is important to remember that making mistakes is normal and even expected, and that they can be opportunities for growth and improvement. By applying these strategies and practicing regularly, individuals can overcome their fear of public speaking and become more confident and effective communicators.

"Confidence is not a guarantee of success, but a pattern of thinking that will improve your likelihood of success, a lot." - Rosabeth Moss Kanter

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